So basically, I'm having a hard time at home, and Catherine invited me to tell some of my ghost stories, so I figure it'll take my mind off a lot, and scare you guys shitless. I'll save the best 'till last.
The Light.
Oh man, where do I start? Well, this one isn't scary.. I'll save the best 'till last I suppose.
One night, walking into my house after being at Jasons, I was walking into the garden when something like, went through me. No joke, I saw a white flash and something went through me, I could feel it man! That was so weird, when I think about it, I can still feel it in my chest. I wonder who it was, eh?
Bastard hit me!
Oh god, have to mention this- I had an old friend called Calum, we went way back (he started on the drugs though, and only monge smoke bongs, as you guys know). Anyways, he was at a BBQ at my aunties, and he said he was taking a slash.. and something hit him on the back of the head! Hahahaahahahaha, in my biggest laugh.
The house.. and THE CHAIR!
You'd be right in thinking these aren't scary at all (the fuck, Mel?), but I promise, they only get better. So, Ellen's house. Ellen is my auntie, and it was in her house Calum was smacked on the head when he took a piss. Anyways, her house is freaky as fuck. There is, without a doubt, something in there. We hear whispers, there's clicking, something breathes down your neck, and the cat goes mad. And you have no idea if it really happened, because nothing moves around to tell you you weren't imagining it. Unless you're in THE CHAIR.
The chair is always cold. Always. And when you sit in it, your legs go numb. I always wondered if it was my grandad, he only had one leg in the end. Either way, I've sat in it when I've had no choice, and heard some weird shit.
Oh god, and the figures. I've seen figures on the stairs, my cousin's seen them at her bed, my auntie's seen them. Sometimes you'll hear running around, but no one's there.
The face
Oh man, how could I forget the face? I was drunk as fuck a few years ago. Think I was about.. 14 or something, at a house party at my auntie's, and I was so drunk I was taking pictures of the cat. Looked at them the next day, there was a face in the window. And it was fucking horrible, this skeleton face. I wish I still had the picture, but we weren't too good with stopping our computer blowing up in the end.
Ellen's: Table Tipping.
So we wanted to know what the shit was in her house. And well, we were watching some fucked up thing on the TV about this kinda stuff, and Isabel goes, "let's do table tipping!". Dumb cow, lmao.
So there we were, table on the floor, the very tips of our fingers on it, asking who was there. "Dad, is it you?", Ellen asked. Suddenly, the cat goes apeshit. There's clicking noises in the dining room next to us. And the table lifts. Not shakes, but lifts, man. About an inch. We're all lookng at who could have done it as a trick. Trust me, no one. Turns out, my dead Grandad slapped Calum on the head while he was taking a piss!
The man with the funny hat
My sister Kayleigh, she's a bit of a freak really. Need to watch for those quiet ones. One time she saw my grandma about a week after she died, walking down the road.
But this isn't about that, this is about the man with the funny hat. There was a kid who lived here, who always wore a baniclava. Went up the road one day, to where we lived at the time, threw his baniclava off and killed himself on the train tracks. Poor kid.
After that, Kayleigh had what we all thought was an imaginary friend. This "man with the funny hat", who lived at the bottom of the garden. She drew this creepy ass picture that I wish I kept of him and stuff. Abouta week later, a baniclarva turns up on our doorstep.
Fuck man, lol.
After my mam got up the duff again (I love my sister Charlotte, but what was my mam thinking? She can't even look after herself), we moved into this place we're in now. Guess who lived there? The man with the funny hat. No joke. Some kind of fucked up fate, that is.
Joe
When I was 15, Joe Tait was one of my good friends. We'd hang out, me him, Calum and Robin every Saturday. When I was 15 though, Joe died. He accidentaly overdosed on anti-depressants (he was a happy kid, and had a bad time, thought his dad's meds would make him better. I guess he didn't read the bottle or something). Anyways, he loved Slipknot. And I still had his Slipknot pendant he asked me to look after at a gig.
I wore that thing every day. And every night, I could hear running up and down my stairs. I thought it was the man in the funny hat, to be honest. Every night, the same running up and down the stairs.
Well, when I was at Jason's, I took it off once (yes, har de har, you know what I was up to) and forgot to pick it up before I left. No running up and down the stairs at mine that night- nope, at Jason's instead.
Sorry Joe, but I had to get rid of it mate, I got no sleep, you coont! So I put it on your grave the next week when I visited. Love you man.
The phone.
So one night, before Jason and I got together, we were on the phone. Before Jason and I were together, we were more than aggirvated at us not being together, and we kinda took it out on each other sometimes, arguing about little things (side note:
not sleeping with Racci Shay may have caused an argument, but it got us together, in a way ;]).
So one night, we're arguing about somehting, Jason's at his wits end trying not to lose me, I'm crying. Same shit at the time, glad things got a million times better later. And it cuts off.
And comes back.
"What the fuck was that?" I say.
When I said this, I was listening to Green Day (Grampy loved them) and I could smell cigars. I don't smoke cigars.
"It was a "hello". It sounded weird".
I knew.
"Did it sound.. I dunno, this is weird to say, but did it sound kind of, half Scottish, half Spanish?"
"Yes!"
Cool.
That was weird.
Here it is: hanging man in Kaz's bathroom.
This is the scariest. I'm sure I'm missing out a few stories, but whatever.
I had a boyfriend called Kaz, who you may know also as "the biggest mistake of my life". I was at his once, and went to use the bathroom. When I was washing my hands, I looked up in the mirror.
And what did I see?
A man. Hanging. In the shower. Blood on his face, all kinda shit.
I mentioned it to Kaz and his mam in the living room.
"Shit y'know what?", his mam said. "I've seen that before".
Maybe it was an omen, telling us what'd happen if we kept this kid in our lives, as Kaz hit me a couple of weeks after. I left his sorry ass at Joni's party the next day.
And yea, that was it.. now to add some pictures.. hope you guys aren't too scared. Cathrine and Amanda, don't go into labour just yet!
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hopeful
